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SOME THINGS I'VE LEARN IN OVER TEN YEARS OF LIVING IN THAILAND

1. Appearance IS reality. What you look like (clothes, transportation and other accoutrements) is, in fact, YOU.

2. Thai people are friendly but making true friends is difficult.

3. Favors require reciprocation.

4. When walking or driving never move more than a couple of inches right or left without looking over your shoulder or in the rearview mirror.

5. Never LOSE your temper. You will LOSE every time.

6. Usually people who seem to be laughing at you aren't.

7. You WILL be stared at.

8. You will be perceived as having more money than most.

9. Apologies are infrequent.

10. Thai men's approach to drinking alcohol is different than that of Western men as is their subsequent behavior.

11. After you have waited for as long as you think you can wait, you will wait some more. (Being is more important than becoming.)

12. Thais love to have fun in everything they do. Often their idea of fun is VERY different than ours and often it is noisy.

13. Status matters -- A lot. (See #1.)

14. Always be polite to policemen.

15. Dress in good clothes when going to government offices (See #1.)

16. Everyone I know who has bought a condo, regrets doing so.

17. People will ask to borrow money from you. In most cases, the best answer is that you don't have it because there is a strong possibility you won't be repaid.